What’s the sex of your Harley?

In English it’s a plain neutral the motorbike, in French a firm masculine le motocycle, and in German, neutral again, das Motorrad, but then quickly mutating into a feminine character, die Harley, die Honda, etc…

So what is the sex of your ride? The more I am having a deep platonic look at the different aspects of my new Harley Davidson, the more I come to the conclusion that I may have to  give it a name, as you do with with your sailing ship, or if filthy rich, airplanes.

But when thinking of a name, the first question – as with your newborn baby – is the one of its/his/her sex, as only very few boys should be named Sue.

I surfed the web, but could not find any strong guidance on the subject, so I went on to analyze the names bikers gave their Harley-Davidson’s. I am not mad, please remember, I am bored, waiting for my Road King Classic to be delivered, and today I learned it is delayed by a full week.

In summary I must report that no clear sexual orientation can be spotted, although female names have a slight lead.

Although the sample I analyzed using the net is relatively small, one can conclude that the names are to be categorized into 5 groups:

A – Female – winner seems Betty, Betsy or Lucy
B – Male – Chub, Chip, Roscoe
C – Descriptive, based mainly on (C1) color  black, pearl or cherry or (C2) behavior wicked or taker
D – CPI (Clearly Politically Incorrect) ________
E – Plain or no name, like “bike” or “Harley“, “Dyna” or “Road King

The CPI ones are the most funny, no surprise here, and some actually make sense, but the boring majority, neither entertaining nor creative, are the plain ones.

Please find a collection of names at the bottom of this post.

Trust me, your bike will not behave like a well trained dog, it will not come to you when you call it, even will not react if you yell its name. But the number of syllables in the name need some consideration. From a monosyllabic name like “dog”, “Bob”, “Boy”) to a disyllabic name like “Ma.rie”, “pu.ppy” or “Ber.tha”, one could accept for a bike a trisyllabic name like “Wol.ve.rine”, but there the fun should stop. Or do you want your bike to be known as koo.ka.bu.rra or hi.ppo.po.ta.mus. Thinking of it, why not… my kookaburra or my hippopotamus, that has a ring to it.

All my previous bikes had plain names, or none, the Pan European was creatively called the Pan European, and the Goldwing, to avoid surprises or stupid questions: the Goldwing. The Yamaha Majesty was my “Majesty” and the Piaggio… well… I am not yet sure what will stick, if its “Piaggio” or “MP3”, but there is no real need or urgency yet, as I usually raise more eyebrows by staying in the C (descriptive) section calling it: “this scooter with 2 front wheels“. And the MZ 250 ETZ was named as every bike of this brand is called in Gernamy: “Emme”, not sure why though.

So what name am I going to give to the Road King Classic? Well, it could be a male name, the name of somebody who captured my imagination some decades ago while reading a book about him, somebody epitomizing the image of the brooding wanderer. A trusted companion, much of his life is the stuff of legend, of whom it is reported that he did cut a forbidding appearance, although he was said to have rarely bathed or changed his clothes.

I think I may go with:

Musashi

Miyamoto Musashi

I hope you do not take this post too seriously, and for you pleasure, here some of the names and remarks I found on the web, including some hilariously funny CPI ones:

  • I like to call my Harley “Night Train from Hell“!
  • 2003 flstci “The Gypsey Rose” named after my wife
  • Norma Jean, after my late mother, 03 Anniversary FatBoy
  • Betsy, cuz its an all american name for an all american bike
  • Katrina… I named by Heritage Softail Katrina
  • I named my 97 police Electra Glide “Roscoe“.
  • I affectionately refer to my bike as “The Hell B1tch“.
  • My Dyna LowRider was given the name “Lucy“…as in “Lucy I’m home”!!
  • 06 FLHTCI I call it **** (you know that dare thing that hangs between your legs with two balls)
  • My 06 Softail Deluxe is name “Cherry Bud“.
  • My 03 Anny fatboy is called “Stupid Thing“. Mostly because that is what my wife calls it. “Are you riding that Stupid Thing again?? Being the sensitive guy, I usually respond with “well somebody has to ride something around here”
  • My Ex calls my bike JAFTICA (Just Another F#@king Toy I Can’t Afford) that would explain why she is my EX
  • My Fat Boy’s name is Chub, because he is and also causes…….
  • My RoadKing is named Mighty Whitey.
  • VAL . . . short for Valvoline!
  • 05 Roadking Custom. I call er “Black Betty” after the song from the 70s.
  • I have a black 95-inch 2004 Dyna. Her name is also “Black Betty
  • Well, to be fair, my bike’s real given name is “Ebony Elizabeth
  • My purple/orange 06 FLSTC I dont necessarily “call”, more I “refer” to as the “grape ape” – drawing on the “raped ape” term of the 70’s. After a few mods on the offseason, she may morph into the “Grrrraped Ape”.
  • Depends on what mood I’m in… usually my ‘cycle
  • I just call her sweetie, the wife calls her That Other Woman. 03 Wide Glide
  • Pearl. Because of the paint, gold white pearl. It just stuck.
  • My black Roadking’s name is “Black Betty” after a song from the seventies.
  • My wife calls mine “that @!%^* motorcycle” but I love her anyway, my bike that is. Thats why I call her “Mistress”
  • Mine will be : ICEmobile
  • After busting my 80 cuber and 5 speed within the last month and buyin a 96″ s&s and 6 speed my bikes name varies depending on my mood from Moneypit to “piece off F#@&$*G S%@T“….but I still love her lots….
  • Oh yeah, my bikes name is Mr. Breeze II.
  • I pulled up to some friends right after I bought it. One of the guys says look its Chips, like the Tv show. Now it kind of stuck. 06 white Ultra.
  • Hey there, my sporty`s name is Cobalt for her color cobalt blue, my friends call me Crash because I have wrecked six times.
  • Black Beauty she is a pretty ride.
  • Right now, she’s tentatively called “Spock“, bein’ a green blooded Vulcan and all.
  • Named My Street Bob “STREBO
  • Have a 06 FXDI. I call her “Old Black Betty“. She’s all black and I get a RUSH everytime I ride her !!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • I never really gave it a name, but if i had to it would be sporty punk rawk!….kinda lame….i also would go with bad seed ( thats what i have tattooed across my stomach)…and a friend of mine out it on his bike
  • Used to hear my wife call the bike the Burning Blade, but I think she goes better by the name of Wild Fire, don’t you think.
  • I just call her SISTER.
  • Refer to my 06 Heritage Softtail as Crazy Train
  • The wife said I should name mine “Taker“. Mainly because it “Taker” all my money
  • The wife calls it the Milwaukee Vibrator
  • Harleys have been called Milwaukee Vibrator, since …forever. And, the name is well earned.
  • Black Velveteen, simple and clean oh what a bad machine.
  • I’m with Thug on this, I’ve tried, but I just call her “the bike“. I can’t find a name that suits her.
  • I have always leaned to the “Ghost Dancer” but the wife call’s it with
    distain I might add, the “Iron Mistress“.
  • 77FLH,79FXE both have the same name—MINE!
  • I’ve just always referred to all my bikes as “Baby“…*hint* …this
    works equally well with ladies
  • i refer to mine as MY BABY
  • I’ve not had my softail long enough to name it, however the blue
    sportster that I used to have was named “Betty Paige” the original bad
    girl pin up
  • how bout Black Betty?
  • Having trouble coming up with a name for mine as well. The vacuum seems
    to fit because any time there’s any extra cash it sucks it up
  • I’ve started calling mine “The Btch”   Takes all my money and still
    won’t let me ride her
  • Mine’s Mr. Bob.
  • Mine is Black Beauty..not to be confused with all of the Black Betty’s
    out there.
  • Yep…Stuart Pidd. (“Stu” for short)
  • Mine’s called Prozac. A great cure for what ails you.
  • My 06 Ultra, Scarlet/Grey Pearl, I call “Scarlet“.
  • My 05 FLHPI is called “Whitey“.
  • I call her “The Pearl
  • i call mine Melanie after my wife
  • I call mine My Baby
  • Mine is the Black Pup. Also my License Plate. We also have a bunch of
    Labradors running around.
  • I have a big ole glossy black Road King Classic with hard bags and other
    mods and she looks so low and fat and cool, I call her “The Phat Ho“. Of
    course there’s a double meaning on the “Phat/Fat” “Cool/Big”.
  • Mine’s still the Beyotch. Even more so now
  • My Mechanic named mine the “great white shark“. So when ever I call in I
    just tell them its for the “Great white”
  • Not very original, but I call my “Pat“. It’s short for Patriot, in the
    Patriot Edition Softail Custom
  • got one named “bug” then I put a windshield on her
  • My wife calls my pan the mistress. She says every man has a mistress, it
    could be golf, drinking or even another woman. I call it the Tin
    Machine
    .
  • Citizen’s Arrest
  • My 88 Sporty affectionately (sometimes not so fondly…lol) referred to
    as “The Black B tch
  • I think if was to name mine, Id have to get to know it first. And I
    havent had this one very long. But If I was to name it now…..Pepper
  • Mine is called Bad Dawg. When she eats hard-earned money I just holler
    “bad dawg!” and all is forgiven
  • I don’t call it nothing when it’s running right. I call it a lot of
    things when it ain’t, but I can’t type them here
  • mine is just Mr. Davidson, I thank Mr. Davidson everytime I go on a long
    uneventful ride with no bike or other mishaps
  • P.O.S. because its my little p.o.s.
  • I call it “my bike“,”my motorcycle“, “my scoot“, and a few others but it
    doesn’t seem to matter what I call it, damn thing doesn’t come to me, just sits there looking sharp
  • finally got one for her, i call her my death trap, shes wabbley, the
    rear tire jumps off the ground, if i go above 80 i get herendis speed
    woobles, my arms fall asleep, and she spits water in my face in the rain
    so i can’t see….but she’s mine and i love her
  • My daughter named the NT “Sally“. I have no idea where she came up with
    that but it’s cool with me. I refer to the Sportster as the “Sporty“. I
    know…REAL original! lol I call my truck “Trigger”, Trigger was the
    name of Roy Rogers’ trusty horse
  • I don’t have an official name for my bike, just “My Baby” or “My Lil
    Gray Pony
  • My other half calls my old FLH ” Harley Ferguson” !! She says it plugs
    along like a trusty tractor would, day after day.. I just refer it as
    the “ferg”…
  • I’ve named my bike “Storm” or “Stormy…
  • Call my Night Train ‘SKIPPY‘ after the kangaroo cos since I had her
    lowered thats how she takes the bends!!!!
  • Mine’s called Silver just like the lone ranger’s Horse
  • Vivian. Sexy name… Old FLHS was Ethyl
  • Call mine Da Springa for obvious reasons.
  • I just call min by the color,, one is yelleran blak the other is my
    dresser
  • The new girl in the harem is going to be called: Glamor Biaatch!
  • Since I’m trying to learn New Testament Greek, my first bike was
  • Agathos, (good or useful) and the one I have now is Purros Hippos which means the red horse.
  • The 07 FXST I call “JD“, as in Jack Daniels.
  • The name Casper came to me so that’s what I went with. Hubby got me some personalized plates to boot
  • Well mine’s a red sportster so I call her Ruby.
  • I call her Bonnie “Like outlaws Bonnie and Clyde”
  • sounds and looks wicked therefore I named her “Wicked
  • my DX is named TARA and it stands for the way she runs, like a Twice Ass Raped Ape.

Source: cyclespot.com

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7 Responses to “What’s the sex of your Harley?”

  1. T4TEXAS Says:

    I call my 2003 100 year Heritage Softail “Spankie”. Yes, loves to be ridden and given a good spank now and then, so I accomodate Spankie.

  2. My family every time say that I am killing my time here at net, except I know
    I am getting knowledge all the time by reading such pleasant
    articles or reviews.

  3. I call my Fat Boy ‘Angus’ after Angus Young from AC/DC.

  4. I call my 86 Sportie “Somethin’ Special ’cause when my current hubbie was trying to pick me up, he kept telling me he would give me “Somethin’ Special”. ya think??
    I am trying to figure out what to call my newly aquired 57 Panhead.

  5. Jess benham Says:

    i called my fatboy chubby. now i have a roadking and need to name it.

  6. I like to call her “Tater” because the exaust makes that nice POTATO, POTATO, POTATO sound!

  7. +1 on an awesome collection of bike nicknames. Cool!

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